The Monotonous Miller Melodrama: Motherhood Forensics 101

Saturday, June 14, 2008

Motherhood Forensics 101

Brynne claims someone "stole" her sour mints & some of her gum today! Oh my word! Would a sibling DO that?! Mommy "Sleuth" Miller is on the case....

I made each of them lick a napkin (twice for extra surety) & Lily began to sweat bullets - put their initials on it & sat it on Jim's nightstand overnight. Then, I explained to the 3 youngest, "that in the morning I will take a magnifying glass to it & the spit will have evaporated & I will be able to count the dry sugar crystals on each napkin! Thus, outing the Minty Bandit!" Someone will lose some sleep tonight....

Alyssa helped immensely with my charade when she said, "OH NO! Not the napkin test! It always caught me when I was little!" And my sweet, innocent (naive) Brynne - in all seriousness, "Mom, is that test for real? How does it work? Will you do it to me, too?" She is amazed at the scientific things her mom knows - yet, for some reason I can't master the English language - my native tongue - to save my own life!

Until tomorrow! Music fades......

3 comments:

tamiz said...: oh smart mama! Much better than yelling. I need to be more creative in my punishments; June 16, 2008 at 9:07 PM
Jolayne said...: Did you find the culprit? That's what enquiring minds want to know.; June 17, 2008 at 7:15 AM
KrisJ said...: That is hularious! AND I will put that to the test!; June 20, 2008 at 7:04 AM

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My FAVORITE Recipes

Butternut Squash Bisque
(AWESOME when paired w/ the salad below & the homemade bread made into breadsticks/rolls!)

1/4 cup butter
2 small onion, chopped
2 stalks celery, chopped
2 medium carrot, chopped
4 medium potatoes, cubed
2 medium butternut squash - peeled, seeded, and cubed
2 (32 fluid ounce) containers chicken stock
salt and freshly ground black pepper to taste

Melt the butter in a large pot, and cook the onion, celery, carrot, potatoes, and squash 5 minutes, or until lightly browned. Pour in enough of the chicken stock to cover vegetables. Bring to a boil. Reduce heat to low, cover pot, and simmer 40 minutes, or until all vegetables are tender.
Transfer the soup to a blender, and blend until smooth. Return to pot, and mix in any remaining stock to attain desired consistency. Season with salt and pepper.

Blueberry Zucchini Bread

3 eggs, lightly beaten
1 cup vegetable oil
3 teaspoons vanilla extract
2 1/4 cups white sugar
2 cups shredded zucchini
3 cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 teaspoon baking soda
1 tablespoon ground cinnamon
1 pint fresh blueberries

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Lightly grease 4 mini-loaf pans.
In a large bowl, beat together the eggs, oil, vanilla, and sugar. Fold in the zucchini. Beat in the flour, salt, baking powder, baking soda, and cinnamon. Gently fold in the blueberries. Transfer to the prepared mini-loaf pans.
Bake 50 minutes in the preheated oven, or until a knife inserted in the center of a loaf comes out clean. Cool 20 minutes in pans, then turn out onto wire racks to cool completely.

My Family's New Favorite Salad

Dressing
1/2 cup white sugar
1/2 cup lemon juice
2 teaspoons diced onion
1 teaspoon Dijon-style prepared mustard
1/2 teaspoon salt
2/3 cup vegetable oil
1 tablespoon poppy seeds (optional)

Salad
1 head romaine lettuce, torn into bite-size pieces
4 ounces crumbled Bleu Cheese
1 cup carmelized pecans (brown sugar carmelization)
1/4 cup dried cranberries, plums & blueberries mix (Costco)
1 apple - peeled, cored & thinly sliced
2-3 pears - peeled, cored & thinly sliced

In a blender or food processor, combine sugar, lemon juice, onion, mustard and salt. Process until well blended. With machine still running add oil in a slow steady stream until mixture is thick and smooth. Add poppy seeds and process just a few seconds more to mix.
In a small frying pan - add 2-3 Tblsp. brown sugar & set on med - med/high heat. Pour in pecans & stir constantly until well coated. Then, continue stirring until cooled - so they don't become a huge clump.
In a large serving bowl combine the romaine lettuce, bleu cheese, pecans, dried berry mix, sliced apple & sliced pear. Toss to mix then pour dressing over salad just before serving and toss to coat.

Chocolate Zucchini Bread

2 (1 ounce) squares unsweetened chocolate
3 eggs
2 cups white sugar
1 cup vegetable oil
2 cups grated zucchini
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
2 cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
3/4 cup semisweet chocolate chips

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Lightly grease two 9x5 inch loaf pans. In a microwave-safe bowl, microwave chocolate until melted. Stir occasionally until chocolate is smooth.
In a large bowl, combine eggs, sugar, oil, grated zucchini, vanilla and chocolate; beat well. Stir in the flour baking soda, salt and cinnamon. Fold in the chocolate chips. Pour batter into prepared loaf pans.
Bake in preheated oven for 60 to 70 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted into the center of a loaf comes out clean.

Homemade White Bread

4 cups warm water
2 Tblsp yeast (NOT bread machine yeast)
3 Tblsp sugar (or honey)

Put in a plastic bowl until foamy (I put it in my plastic Bosch bowl - so it is a one bowl recipe). NEVER use metal spoons or bowls with yeast - It will kill it.

Then, add to the foamy mixture:
1 Tblsp salt
3 Tblsp oil
8 - 10 cups flour (all purpose)

Knead for 10 minutes (my Bosch does it all for me). Grease 4 pans. Make loaves, 'spank' out the air bubbles. Place in pans & let rise until 2 inches above the pan. (I cover to keep the warmth of the yeast activity in)
Bake at 375' for 25 minutes.

Black Bean Salsa Soup

2 (15 ounce) cans black beans, drained and rinsed
1 1/2 cups vegetable broth
1 cup chunky salsa
1 teaspoon ground cumin
4 tablespoons sour cream
2 tablespoons thinly sliced green onion

In an electric food processor or blender, combine beans, broth, salsa, and cumin. Blend until fairly smooth.
Heat the bean mixture in a saucepan over medium heat until thoroughly heated.
Ladle soup into 4 individual bowls, and top each bowl with 1 tablespoon of the sour cream and 1/2 tablespoon green onion.
Seriously - this recipe kicks the hiney of any restaurant's black bean soup! I serve with warm tortillas to dip in it.

The Brock Meister's Musings

"Mommy, ghosts are GANDER-DUST!" (Dangerous)
Brock woke up from his nap today & with a smile, burst into my room & yelled, "Thathafrath (Sassafrass) is yummy!" Nope... I don't have a clue how to interpret this!
After a Family Home Evening lesson on "Choice & Accountability" - where we discussed the Holy Ghost -- Brock quietly started to panic, "I'm SCARED! The Holy Ghost is coming! The Holy Ghost is coming & he's gonna get me!" I think we celebrate Halloween a little TOO much in our home.....
Grandpa's are a new accessory for Brock. And obviously a little hard to grasp the concept of.... As we visited Jim's parents in St. George, Brock kept pestering Grandma Miller with, "Grandma, where is your 'other one'?" & "Grandma, your 'other one' is sleeping!"
We were working with Lily on perfecting her ABC's, while Brock sat & played with his trucks on the floor near us. I sang the ABC song several times to help Lily get past the 2 areas where she inadvertantly adds 3 extra "T's" into the mix.... Finally, I thought I am breaking the Mommy Code & bribing her with a popsicle if she can do it correctly! At that point, Brock jumps up & stands 3 inches from my face & sings the song PERFECTLY to us all & asks, "Can I have a Popthicle now?".... Uhhhh, yep.
Brock makes it a point (literally) to clarify that girls have "Boobieths" & boys have "Pecths"... all of us girls get tired of the pokes & confirmations!
Out of the blue Brock tells me, "Mommy, I like Ham!" I respond, "That is good to know for Easter!" He snaps back, "Don't call me Feaster!!!"

The Wisdom Of Lily Kate

Lily: "Erika! Do your sea-monkeys sleep?" Erika: "No." Lily: "Well, they are DEAD then!"
Lily was asking me questions about the tornado that hit May 22, 2008 near us... "So, Mommy, where is that tornado now? In TornadoLand?"
After Brock hit Lily: "Mommy, can we take Brock out of all of our pictures? I want him given away! I want to sell him at a garage sale!"
I asked Lily what she learned about in preschool, she said, "We learned about jungles. And tigers that will gobble us up. But, the rest I didn't understand - they were talking it in ENGLISH!" (re: the book Ms. Sheryl read)
"Grandpa, that hat is so you can cover your Bald!" On explaining a golf hat Jim gave to him...
"Uncle Tim, I want you to call a man when you get home... his number is 4529. He is a doorknob fixer man. He will help you." After getting locked in Uncle Tim's bathroom because of a broken doorknob.
"Uncle Tim, when I get some money, I am going to buy you a doorknob & a screwdriver. Then, you can fix your door!" She is relentless...
"Look Mommy! A new firetruck! I think they got it on eBay!"

The Monotonous Miller Melodrama

Saturday, June 14, 2008

Motherhood Forensics 101

3 comments:

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